In China, the traditional practice is for the woman to marry into the man’s family. However, the live-in son-in-law service reverses this custom. Under this arrangement, the husband moves into the wife’s property, and their children typically take her surname, which is usually that of his father-in-law.
Although this idea has gained popularity nationally only in recent years, it has been present in Xiaoshan for decades.
Xiaoshan is the top-ranking district in gross domestic product among the districts of Hangzhou, one of China’s wealthiest cities.
In this city, parents of women do not allow their grandchildren to take on another family’s surname as it symbolizes relinquishing their wealth.
One of the more recent reasons for the surge in popularity is that by including the husband’s name in the woman’s household, her family can receive greater compensation for relocation.
A slogan on the agency’s corridor wall advocates breaking the tradition of women marrying into men’s families and starting a new national campaign where men marry into women’s families.
The Chinese language reflects traditional gender roles in the terms for marriage, with men marrying women referred to as Qu and women marrying men called Jia.
The live-in son-in-law service imposes stringent requirements on its candidates.
Li Jiyan, the founder and top matchmaker at Jindianzi agency since 1999, stated that men must meet certain criteria to be eligible, such as earning over 100,000 yuan (US$14,000) annually, being taller than 170cm, having a credit score of at least 560, and having no criminal record or tattoos.
The registration fee is 15,000 yuan per person for a two-year membership.
Li mentioned that the competition is fierce, with 20 to 30 applications received daily. However, the agency does not welcome men who are only interested in Tang Ping.
Tang Ping, meaning “lying flat,” has become a popular term in China, referring to doing the minimum required to get by.
Li noted a growing number of men, including university undergraduates, applying to become live-in sons-in-law, hoping for a wealthy wife to alleviate pressure to work hard and earn money.
The most sought-after candidates, according to Li, are men with stable jobs at state-owned companies, even more desirable than those who earn over a million yuan but work 996 (9am to 9pm, six days a week) and have an increased risk of baldness due to work stress.
After the news spread, many men on mainland social media expressed interest in becoming live-in sons-in-law, while others had differing opinions.
Some individuals on Weibo hope for a future where there is no distinction between Jia and Qu in marriage, where marriage simply signifies two people coming together.
Another person remarked, “Regardless of gender, some individuals seek to achieve success effortlessly and view marriage as the easiest path.”
